Should You Let People Pick Your Brain for Free?

Yesterday I read an article on Forbes by Adrienne Graham called "No You Can't Pick My Brain For Free." And it prickled me a little.

The author has some legit points.

Some people definitely do try to take advantage of those who have knowledge and are willing to share it freely. And others are just oblivious to the fact that they are asking advice for which the potential advisor is usually paid.

But I have to say this.... the most successful business developers I've observed are those who are willing to "give a little away" and not selfishly withhold every bit of value within their brains.

Generosity and the willingness to have conversations that go beyond selling "why" they should pay for your knowledge (as Ms Graham advises) have worked very well for me, too. 

Her advice is far too black and white. She writes:

If you’re having problem drawing the line in the sand, here are some rules of thumb you should follow:

...Whenever someone wants to pick your brain, make sure you have your fee schedule in front of you. Give them a quote for how much it will cost them. They’ll either pay it or move on. If they move on, good riddance. They weren’t interested in paying you anyway. Let them figure it out on their own.

...Decline lunch/coffee invitations unless they are strictly non-business. If the conversation swings around to business, quickly and politely tell them you’re off the clock. If they are interested in a consult they can book an appointment and let them know what the charge is for that.

...Keep it light. Some of you will probably cave and throw a few nuggets out there. If you do (I hope you don’t), keep it general. Give the why and what but never the how. Anything beyond the why and what comes with a charge. And don’t even point them in the direction to obtain the how. That’s short changing yourself.

If I had held this attitude, there are many wonderful, very profitable engagements I wouldn't have landed.

IMHO, the problems she writes about weren't in the sharing. They were in being able to sniff out the "takers" early enough, and quite possibly in developing good listening skills.

Set boundaries relationship by relationship. But not in aggregate.

No way would I advise a lawyer, accountant or consultant to "decline lunch/coffee invitations unless they are strictly non-business." Guess you should decline golf and ballgames, too? How many relationships have been built on these age-old knowledge-sharing activities?

The interactions that Ms. Graham tells you to avoid allow for you to LISTEN as much as talk. Listening sells. Talking less so.

So, if you are a crummy listener and don't want the opportunity to learn more about a person's situation and needs so that you can eventually discuss ways you might be able to help them, then, yeah, pass on the opportunity to have a turkey sandwich or cuppa. 

Just don't be cynical thinking that everyone's out for your freebies.

If you're new to business development, it's a fact that you've gotta do a bunch of these things to learn how to sniff out the takers...the people who will never buy from you.

You'll get good at it. Trust me. 

Comments

[Mguillemette]

Michelle -
Your thoughts reveal why you are so highly regarded. Generosity of spirit and sharing of knowledge define you. Good business developers absolutely learn to sniff out the "takers", as you describe them. And, as we know, the only way to learn is through experience. But think of all the great conversations AND OPPORTUNITIES we would miss if we weeded out people as the article's author suggests!

[Ron Ratliff]

Michelle,

I agree. Ms. Graham's prescription might work for doctors, plumbers, and others...but I believe that "trusted advisors" understand that many seeds are planted and nurtured before you can begin planning the harvest.

In fact - you have to make yourself yourself available to listen to people that allows you to be of the greatest benefit.

Is there a line? Of course. But it really boils down to whether you're selling your time or selling your knowledge. My physician does not bill me by the hour - I am, after all, looking to them for answers that are actionable rather than quantifiable.

Thanks for raising the issue.

[info .]

Michelle, I couldn't agree with you more. In fact if I employed any of the suggested advice, I would lose any client on which I practiced it.

The very clients in which I invest such a small amount "Freebie Time" are the foundation of my client base that pays my billable hourly rates, which already compensate for a reasonable amount of freebie time.

[Steven Zelin]

Hi Michelle,

I totally agree with your perspective. I was featured in a blog recently and purely as a feedback mechanism and a way to "build community" for the blog I offered a free hour of consultation to anyone who heard about me through the blog. I was surprised at all the calls I received, and as expected I had lots of people who purely wanted free advice, but I also met lots of folks who are now happy clients! I enjoyed meeting with everyone and had a terrific time chatting with each and every person I met about their personal and business needs. I was happy to share my knowledge and provide guidance when needed. I didn't write anyones business plan or amend their tax returns during our meeting but I gave thoughtful advice on whatever was needed and I hopefully planted a seed that I am a resource they could count on if they need professional services in the future.

[Michelle Golden]

Steve, that is a fantastic story and you clearly get it! Congrats and I can tell just from what you've written and the way you've written it that you enjoy the relationship aspect of your business so that is why other people enjoy talking with you. It's a beautiful circle!

Info, I love "freebie time" - we should all budget that in!

Ron, as you totally know, selling one's "time" interferes completely with the greater mission of quality service.

Melinda, those of us who hold the belief that the journey, not the destination, is the whole point (and it's easy to forget during the daily grind...) certainly find it easier to look on even the "wasted" conversations as worthwhile in some way. Just because they don't turn into profits doesn't mean they don't have value. You always make me think. Love that about you!

[Adrienne Graham]

Hello Michelle. Thank you for sharing and commenting on my article. I found your blog today because the post has apparently resurfaced and is once again viral.

I read your comments, and the comments of your readers and tried to keep an open mind. But I think instead of my points being too black and white as you say, you all are not reading for true context. That's OK, everyone will have a different perception of what they read. We're all adults and can agree or disagree peacefully. But I think you all have missed my point, or at least the point of this article which is it was directed toward habitual brain pickers.

I give TONS of free advice, information, etc. Plus I gift services to individuals throughout the year (which I don't speak of for obvious reasons). So for anyone to be shocked angry or bothered by what I said clearly doesn't understand the context of this article. I don't run my business by sniffing out brain pickers and assuming the worst in people. Quite the contrary. But I've been in business a long time and can tell when a person is just fishing for a finished blueprint handed to them or genuinely wants my advice. I listen way more than I speak. And I know how to differentiate consultations from advice.

I stand by every word in that article and don't regret writing it. It was more focused toward people who are habitual brain pickers and people who take advantage. But everyone will read with their own perceptions. Anyway, thanks for sharing and commenting. I'm glad this article sparked (and continues to spark) so much conversation.

Happy New Year to you and I wish you much continued success!

Adrienne Graham
(author of the article)